Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
