I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
