If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
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