can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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