Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
