four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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