your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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