Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
