I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize