im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
