Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
i think im in europe. pls send help
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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