She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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