she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
