What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
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i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
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