To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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