And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
dude i'm inner monologue high
He kissed a someone with a penis
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize