I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
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