Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
