if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
