Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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