The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
