He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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