I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
