i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
