i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize