Sry I called you an 8
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
