@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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