dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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