So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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