If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
You did what with his pubic hair?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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