Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
love makes seman taste better
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize