Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
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Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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