No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
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The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
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I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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