Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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