Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
