I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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