Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
