Bisexual people are plain selfish.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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