her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
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I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
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He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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