can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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