doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD