Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Randomize
