im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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