I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
How's work?
Spinning.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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