Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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