this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Randomize
