i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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