Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
