I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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