Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
