My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
you inspire me to be a worse person
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize