I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize
